First things first: While assembling a proper salad, you must adhere to the constraints of beauty and respect for all things living or that once were. Here are the steps to assist in enriching this mission, and to make a salad you'll be able to enjoy forever.
Below are the steps to assist in enriching this mission, and to make a salad you’ll be able to enjoy forever.
- Ideally, you’ve collected produce from a source that’s as close to the soil it was grown in as possible. There are levels to the places you can purchase from, but sometimes, if not most of the time, this is your local supermarket. There is no shame in this.
- I want you to see what you’re looking at. Take a good look at your honorable harvest and take an earnest vow to use up every bit of matter that lies before you. If you let it go to waste, take note and promise to do better next time. You are now this piece of produce’s harshest critic. Make sure to pick out bits and bobs of it that are no longer desirable. This includes but is not limited to any shriveled, discolored, or decaying matter. This is garbage, not food. Let us be honest every step of the way.
- Gently wash all of your ingredients. This takes time. Use your hands to tear apart heads of lettuce or while de-stemming any fruits and vegetables. Tongs and other metal kitchen utensils can be brutal and should be mostly avoided while handling this delicate dish. Fill a container with the coldest water you can find and submerge your product in batches that fit with room to jostle it gently. Allow the water to weave through all of the crevices of your food, rinsing any grit and residue. Lift the product from the bowl, allowing the soiled water to cascade through your fingers. Transfer to a flat, toweled surface to dry before the next step. Dispose of the water and replenish it with fresh, cold water between batches.
- Process all of your cleaned products. For this particular salad, I quartered my strawberries, shelled and blanched my peas, toasted my pine nuts, crumbled my sheep’s milk cheese, and very finely minced a shallot for the dressing. Conjuring up ideas of what can go in your salad should be fun, not daunting. Remember to think that what grows together goes together and you should be safe from there. If you want to get a little adventurous or impressive, try swapping in an ingredient that doesn’t make much sense on paper but that makes your heart and head sing. It is a very sacred moment when creativity meets intention. Savor this experience when it befalls you.
- Lay all of your washed and processed components in an organized manner before you. In chef speak they call this your mise en place. This is a term in French that means “everything in its right place.” This is also a Radiohead song. Turn on some Radiohead if that’s your speed but sometimes listening to music can be an inhibitor in the kitchen. When you’re cooking something properly you will need access to all of your senses. Perhaps you don’t want to be too serious in your process and just feel like subtly twerking as you cook . . . that’s OK, too. Check in with your product. Remember to be strict about what you consume and what you’re comfortable with providing someone else to consume. Give thanks to the farmers, truck drivers, and occasionally pilots that brought this bounty before you. Consider this food’s roots. Think of how they were once strung through the strata of the earth and how their life cycle ends at your fingertips. Consider its ephemeral nature. Consider the ephemerality of nature as a whole. Shed a tear or two if moved to do so.
- Build your dressing. You can get wild, stupid, crazy here but I like to KISS (Keep It Simple, Stupid). Think salt, fat, acid, freak. In this instance, I did kosher salt, extra virgin olive oil, lemon/malt vinegar/pickled mustard seed, and chopped Calabrian chilis. Whisk all of this in a bowl to combine.
- Lay your dried greens into your bowl. Salt them with a couple pinches of flaky salt and gently toss or massage. This condenses the flavor in each leaf. Remember how blessed you are to have these leaves to prepare as nourishment. Dress your lettuce with caution. As you drizzle your homogenized dressing over the bowl of greens you want every leaf to end up with a light adornment of liquid. If you pick up a leaf no droplets should run off.
- Garnishing is an excellent way to demonstrate the time, effort, and care you took to prepare your salad. It also provides indicators for what it consists of. While preserving some garnish for sprinkling on at the end, gently toss about two-thirds of your additional ingredients into the greens mix.
- Find a plate with a small lip around the edge. Make sure it’s cool and dry to the touch. Gingerly lift your dressed ingredients from your mixing bowl and sculpt a shallow mound on your plate. Try not to fuss too much. Your goal should always be to touch the food the least amount of times. Garnish with your remaining ingredients, tear your herbs and allow them to fall organically atop your assembled sculpture.
- Sit down with an unfolded napkin in your lap. Eat and enjoy your salad with a fork (and knife if it suits your fancy). Bonus points if you clang fork tines with a loved one and share the fruits of your labor together forever.
